Friday, March 7, 2008

U.S. NOT HEADED FOR RECESSION

The U.S. is not headed for a recession according to President George Bush. “We acted robustly to head that off,” he said. “We’re giving everyone $300. We’re even giving it to Democrats, even to people who didn’t vote for us. I hope they’ll remember that $300 when they go to the polls in November. No one can accuse us of just helping rich folks pay less in taxes.”

As for the people losing their homes through mortgage foreclosures, the president said it was just the economy working. “People bought homes they couldn’t afford, and the market place is taking those homes away. That’s the way the system works, and the sooner people learn that, they better off we’ll be.”

By November Mr. Bush believes the market will have made a complete correction, and the people will see the need to keep a Republican government in office. “John McCain has supported our war effort from the beginning. If our troops are not able to discover weapons of mass destruction in Iraq before the end of my term, I’m sure that the McCain administration will be successful in that search.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The economy lost 22,000 jobs in January and another 63,000 in February. President Bush said that the job loss was not a problem. "As soon as Congress makes my tax cuts permanent, the economy will take care of itself."

In other political news, the president said he would veto a bill that would outlaw water boarding. "We need these enhanced interrogation techniques," he said, to find out who is leaking stuff to the press."