UNSUNG HEROES

Poor Al Gonzales got kicked around during his term as U. S. Attorney General, but he is finally getting his reward: The American Bar Association has named him lawyer of the year. The Bush administration is full of people who didn’t get the recognition they deserve. How about Michael Brown. They blamed him for FEMA’s disastrous handling of Hurricane Katrina. At least the president told him he was doing a heck of a job. Since Brown left, things haven’t gotten any better in New Orleans, so maybe Brownie wasn’t the only one at fault.

What about CIA Director of the year? George Tenet assured the White House gang that Iraq’s possession of WMD was a “slam dunk.” At least Tenet got the Medal of Freedom. George Bush should have a bunch of those hanging around to hand out to loyal henchmen.

Don’t forget Gonzales’s assistant, Monica Gooding. She weeded a lot of closet Democrats out of the Attorney General’s office. Did she get any thanks for that? Did the president even say, “Heck of a job, Monica”?

One of the great heroes of the Bush administration is former Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld, who saved a lot of money by trying to invade Iraq on the cheap. He even forced the retirement of General Shinseki when the general suggested that they need a lot more troops to do it right. Then a couple of days after the election, the administration tells Rumsfeld that they don’t require his services any more. So what’s Rummy doing now, sitting around brooding over his treatment?

Then there’s Karl Rove. Once they realize that no one likes him, they just send him back to Texas. That’s a fine thank-you.

Julie MacDonald was doing a heck of a job as Deputy Assistant Secretary in the Department in Interior. She had to rewrite all those reports done by scientists who were not sensitive to business interests when they wrote about endangered species and stuff. When she left, some people cheered. How’s that for appreciation?

Don’t forget Randy Tobias , who as Deputy Secretary of State urged abstinence rather than condoms to prevent AIDS while he employed the services of “DC Madam” Jeanne Palfrey. Now he’s gone home to wherever. Think about all the money he saved by not supplying condoms. Did anyone say, “You’ve done a great job, Randy”?

And of course there’s Wolfy. Paul Wolfowitz did such a great job getting the country into the war in Iraq, and then he became president of the World Bank for a while before he was forced out. Someone should at least name him Banker of the Year.

One of the Nicest and Most Honorable Men

SOME VERY SERIOUS SINS

Jeanette Maier of New Orleans called Senator David Vitter “one of the nicest and most honorable men I’ve ever met.” The senator has long been a champion of family values. He is against abortion and same-sex marriage. Despite his strong position on family values, however, Mr. Vitter has no objection to patronizing whorehouses. His name, along with that of former U. S. Global AIDS coordinator Randy Tobias, was found on the telephone list of D. C. madam Deborah Jeane Plafrey.

This is not the first time that Vitter has been connected with prostitutes. Jeanatte Maier, who called him, “one of the nicest and most honorable men,” should know. She was acquainted with lots of men in her role as madam of a high-priced New Orleans brothel.

To his credit, the senator did not try to claim, like Randy Tobias, that he has “some gals come over to give him a massage.” Vitter admitted that he had some “very serious sin in his past.” We agree. Hypocrisy is a serious sin.

Senator Vitter had been campaigning for Rudy Guiliani in the South because the former New York City mayor needed someone with a strong conservative image to counteract his moderate/liberal position.

Guiliani is now looking for a conservative family-values politician who doesn’t have a secret life of hidden sin.